Hate Valentine’s Day? You’re not alone. For many, February 14th feels like a fabricated “Hallmark holiday,” built more for selling cards and chocolates than celebrating genuine connection. If the idea of red roses and overpriced prix-fixe dinners makes you cringe, don’t worry—you’re in good company. But what if Valentine’s Day didn’t have to be all about romantic relationships?
Lincoln Park Therapy Group Founder Nicolle Osequeda offers a fresh perspective on how to approach the holiday. In an article written for the Chicago Athletic Clubs, Nicolle explores how to “repurpose” Valentine’s Day, transforming it into a celebration of all meaningful relationships in your life. Whether you’re single, partnered, or somewhere in between, this approach can help you not just survive Valentine’s Day, but actually enjoy it.
Expanding the Meaning of Valentine’s Day
Traditionally, Valentine’s Day focuses on romantic love, but Nicolle encourages us to think outside the box. Relationships come in many forms, and Valentine’s Day can be an opportunity to honor the people who enrich your life in non-romantic ways. Whether it’s the coworker who always has your back, the neighbor who waters your plants when you’re away, or your parents who have shown you unconditional love, these connections matter just as much—if not more—than fleeting romantic gestures.
By expanding the meaning of the holiday, you can take the pressure off and find joy in celebrating the people who truly matter to you.
Creative Ways to Celebrate Valentine’s Day
Here are some of Nicolle’s top tips for turning Valentine’s Day into a celebration of meaningful relationships:
- Host a “Galentine’s Day” Party
Gather your closest friends for a fun, low-pressure celebration. Whether it’s a brunch, movie night, or spa day, spending time with your besties can be a refreshing alternative to traditional Valentine’s festivities. Plus, it’s a chance to express gratitude for the friendships that uplift and support you year-round. - Surprise Your Coworkers
Remember those Valentine’s Day goody bags you used to exchange in elementary school? Bring back the tradition by creating small treats for your coworkers. It’s a thoughtful gesture that can brighten the office atmosphere and remind everyone of the simple joys of connection. - Show Appreciation for Your Neighbors
Has a neighbor helped you shovel snow, retrieve a package, or lend you a tool? Use Valentine’s Day as an excuse to say thank you. A handwritten note or a small gift can go a long way in strengthening the bonds within your community. - Honor Your Parents
Valentine’s Day isn’t just for couples—it’s also a perfect time to acknowledge the love and support of your parents or guardians. Whether it’s a heartfelt phone call, a bouquet of flowers, or a home-cooked meal, showing appreciation for all they’ve done is a meaningful way to celebrate. - Practice Self-Love
Don’t forget about yourself! Take the opportunity to indulge in activities that bring you joy. Whether it’s treating yourself to your favorite meal, spending time on a hobby, or simply relaxing with a good book or movie, self-care is an essential part of surviving—and thriving—on Valentine’s Day.
Shift the Focus: It’s About Connection, Not Perfection
A major reason people feel disheartened by Valentine’s Day is the unrealistic expectations surrounding it. From grand romantic gestures to picture-perfect social media posts, the pressure to “perform” love can feel overwhelming. By shifting your focus to meaningful connections, you can let go of those societal pressures and create a day that feels authentic and fulfilling.
You might also consider reaching out to someone who may feel overlooked during the holiday. A phone call to a relative, a kind message to a friend, or a small act of kindness for a stranger can make Valentine’s Day brighter for someone else—and for you too.
Embrace the Day Your Way
Whether you’re celebrating with friends, family, coworkers, or simply enjoying your own company, Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about romance. It can be a day to reflect on the people and relationships that add value to your life, big or small.
If you’re feeling stuck on how to make the day meaningful, Nicolle’s advice is simple: “Repurpose the holiday to reflect your values and the relationships you hold dear.”
For more inspiration on surviving Valentine’s Day no matter your relationship status, check out Nicolle’s article on the Chicago Athletic Clubs website. And remember: Valentine’s Day is what you make of it, so make it yours.
Additional Resources on Surviving the Holidays
Simple Ways to Restart (or Reset) Holiday Traditions – Break the tradition habit.
A Guide To Prepare For The Holidays : Keep Calm & Holiday On – It’s worth it to prepare yourself before the holidays are here.
Navigating Holiday Anxiety: Finding Serenity Amidst the Chaos – Self-care practices and anti-anxiety tools.
Nicolle Osequeda, LMFT, is the founder of Lincoln Park Therapy Group, specializing in anxiety, depression, and relationship counseling in Chicago. As a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator, she incorporates Dr. Brené Brown’s research into her therapy. Nicolle holds a Master’s in Counseling Psychology from the University of San Francisco and is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Illinois and California. She is a Clinical Fellow of AAMFT, a member of IAMFT, and the Financial Therapy Association. Nicolle has Gottman Method training and has taught at DePaul University, dedicated to helping individuals and couples achieve meaningful change. 
